Many states offer married couples the option to file for a legal separation as an alternative to traditional divorce. In most states, a legal separation can address the same issues as a divorce but at the end of the process the couple is still legally married. To make your legal separation easier and faster, negotiate a separation agreement with your spouse before filing for the separation or shortly thereafter.

Instructions
Make a list of all issues that need to be settled in your separation. Common categories include children, support (child or spousal), visitation, marital residence and division of debts and assets.

Familiarize yourself with your state statutes about division of assets, visitation and support. State statutes can be found on court websites, at a law library or at the public library. Knowing what your state allows gives you a better idea of where to start in your negotiations.

If your state is a community property state, determine an equal distribution of the debts and assets. If your state is not a community property state, then determine what you and your spouse had in assets when you entered the marriage. Take the additional assets and divide them equally as a starting point. Do the same for the debts. DivorceSource.com (see Resources) lists each state and its property distribution laws.

Determine who will have primary custody of the children. Though the presumption that the mother will always get the children has faded somewhat from the legal system, it's still an uphill battle in many states for a father to get custody. Start with visitation according to the visitation guidelines in your state. Courts do not like to deviate much from the guidelines unless the parties agree or there is a compelling reason.

Complete a child support worksheet and use that as the starting point in your negotiations. Laws differ from state to state, but generally the court will take into account both parents' income, child care expenses, health insurance costs and child support being paid for previous children. Again, courts will not deviate from those guidelines without a very good reason. If allowed in your state, a starting point for spousal support can be calculated by estimating the difference in the money available to you during the marriage and what you will be able to make after the separation.

Think rationally about the marital residence. If you can afford to continue to live there and you will have custody of the children, ask for the marital residence in your negotiations. If you cannot afford to live there, concede the property to your spouse or agree to sell it and split the profit.

Tips & Warnings
• Always consult with an attorney if possible before representing yourself in court.
• You may have additional issues to negotiate in your agreement.