My Chinese Wife Set a Trap
usnook | 2013-07-31 17:36

I am Max. I was teaching English in China. I was attracted by the advertisements calling to teach English in China, and for exotic locales and adventure. I got that alright. Now back home in the US I am completely pissed off and unhappy. I honestly wished to God I had not gone to China and tangled with Chinese women. They are the most cunning and manipulative in the world. I am now left with a whole hole in my life; and a great sense of having been used and abandoned.

I initially thought I found heaven. Indeed, I fell head over heels with my Chinese wife, one of my students at English class. She was so sweet and nice. After marriage, things changed ever so slightly but surely. She became ever so unhappy with my job as English tutor. She said it was 'a job with no future'. She said it was 'a low class job' with little pay and gave her no 'face'. She egged me to go home to the US telling me how wonderful life would be there. Besotted with my 'sweet' wife, I became more and more uncomfortable in China when even her parents and relatives became 'cooler' towards me, just after a half year of marriage. I decided to go back to US with my wife, moving to San Francisco thinking she would be happy there, many Chinese.

Indeed in the first year back I thought I found heaven. My wife immediately started to get to know the local Chinese community and started working in the Chinese restaurant, starting as dishwasher and moving on to assistant cook, keeping long hours. Her earnings were not much; how much can you get from a Chinese restaurant? But she was happy and did not have much complaints. She insisted though to get her 'green card' as spouse of an American citizen; and I was proud of her to do so, thinking that this proved her commitment to me and my country. Little did I know.

My 'sweet' wife got her US citizenship and things changed from thereon, overnight and never looked back until she left me.

After she got her citizenship papers my wife asked me, demanded me to get her parents and relatives over, to sponsor them. I told her I cannot get her parents over as I was not earning enough; what are they going to live on? At this she laughed and said that 'in China men took care of the family and wives hold on to what they earn'. She would not give what she earned, she laughed at my job and earnings saying that most Chinese think Americans are 'well off', 'Now she really knows this is not true. I was the example.' This really hurt me bad. She then nagged me to sponsor her brother and family over; he is a computer technician. To keep the family peace, hoping things will go back to the good old sweet days I agreed. I went through hell and high water to get them over. She, my wife, was ecstatic to see her brother and family. But things did not really change. She worked long hours, scarcely gave me time and mixed even more with her brother's family.

She kept egging me on to get her parents and a cousin over. She kept on saying my job and earnings were 'a disgrace'. I could not even help her take care of her parents. I was 'indeed a great disappointment'. She kept on being cold to me and spent little time with me. I was not able to get her parents over; but I did manage to sponsor her cousin. This was my greatest mistake.

It turned out that he was not her cousin after all. He was a smooth looking young man with a computer science degree. Six months after her 'cousin' came over; my wife just quietly left the flat. I came back one evening and all her clothes and things were cleared out, clean. I searched hell and high water for her, I could not find her. Six months later, I received papers from a lawyer in Chinatown for divorce. It turned out that her 'cousin' is now her partner. The last I heard of her is that her parents are now over here. Her 'cousin' and her brother had got them over.

"Chinese women were so approachable and didn't appear to hate men. [They are shockingly] sweet and feminine."

This is COMPLETELY UNTRUE. They are only so because they want something from you. They want to get 'a green card' to a Western country, and they want to get their parents and relatives over to have the good life here, also to sponge of welfare and the pension. I have seen this many times from many friends. Same experience. Once they get the green card the will leave us 'hairy gweilos'. They think we are rich; once they realise we are not, they change overnight. They look down on you.

The best ladies my friends tell me are Filipinos. They are more westernised and they are actually prettier. They are warmer, have more 'heart'. They really love Americans. Many of my friends are turning off the East Asians - Chinese, Koreans, Japanese. They are too rich now. They look down on you. Filipinos and South East Asians like Laotians are better. Particularly FILIPINOS. They know American culture better; and they love us. They have more 'heart'.

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